Your reviewer must confess to an inital suspicion where Wakefield trio THE CRIBS were concerned. Yes, they appeared refreshingly brash, but on encountering their "we're the best band in the world, us"-style rhetoric in the dear old NME, your correspondent began to think "Here we go: it's The Paddingtons all over again - East End Urchins, Northern branch mark.2" etcera et bleedin' cetera.
Yet the trio's recent biz-obsessing singles "Hey Scenesters!" and the new "Mirror Kissers" suggested this band of brothers (literally, as Ryan, Gary and Ross Jarman are all answerable to the same Mammy) had a real way with this snotty, playpen-decimating pop-punk and might just make it happen when new (second, and I think we can safely say 'eagerly awaited') album "The New Fellas" hits the racks in time for the major summer festivals.
And, in the main, "The New Fellas" doesn't disappoint, either. Clocking in at a satisyfyingly economical 34 minutes and with sensible sonic guidance by old campaigner Edwyn Collins at the production helm, this is in many ways The Cribs' real debut album and sounds like the very epitome of sparky, snotty indie pop/ punk which - like all good infants - brings mostly smiles of joy and elation as well as moments of frustration when it spits its' dummy across the floor and starts screaming.
Admittedly, both of the singles are amongst the best tracks. "Mirror Kissers" is a fizzing shag grenade of junior Ramones attitood, while the excellent "Hey Scenesters!" finds room for handclaps amidst its' anti-industry diatribe and ends with the memorably barbed couplet "Everybody loves you now/ Just don't go and let us down." Quite. An epitaph in the making if ever there was.
But these are by no means the only stand-outs. Both the skinnily infectious "I'm Alright, Me" and the drum-heavy "Martell" are impressively accurate gobs of vitriol aimed at the tastemakers, with the terrace chant that brings the former to a conclusion ("Take drugs, don't eat, have contempt for those you meet") one of the best bright-young-thing-in-the-industry put down your reviewer has heard in ages. Bullseye.
Elsewhere, when the lads finally put down the muskets and let their libidos get in the way, they can still convince. "We Can No Longer Cheat You"s title might sound like a slice of militant, Pop Group-style polemic, but it's actually a love song of sorts ("I lost my heart to a dancer, an easy pick up for chancers/ What she saw in me I don't know") with a surprisingly melancholic chorus. "It Was Only Love" is a goodie, too, with Ryan playing wobbly accordion and the band following suit with a cheekily mellifluous La's-esque creation. It's especially effective as Ryan's lyrics are so dismissive ("But if I dress you like me then you'll still never be more than your bus fare to me") and gets accentuated by some nicely well-oiled violin.
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Bits of it are too scabby and spotty to succeed, though. "The Wrong Way To Be", for example, initially sounds like it'll be a right bruiser, but it's ultimately too generic and gormless for my liking, while the distorto climax just sounds hackneyed. It doesn't help that the equally clueless "Haunted" comes along in its' wake, either. No doubt The Cribs thought recording a song on Scarborough Beach would be a top wheeze, but the end results are similar to the anguish you feel when you encounter some of Pete Doherty's acoustic demos - you simply wish they'd remained in the vault.
Still, "The New Fellas" ends on a high, thanks to "Things Aren't Gonna Change" and - while we're sort've on the subject of ex-Libertines - it's ironic that another one (erstwhile Doherty stand-in Anthony Rossomando) turns up to play a gloriously uneducated trumpet on this track, merely helping to fuel the feeling of full-tilt, joyful abandon and cranking the enjoyment up way past 11.
I can't deny that even at its' best "The New Fellas" doesn't entirely dispel the underlying feel that The Cribs may simply end up being one of the easily-assimilated 'next big things' of 2005 and struggle where longevity is concerned. Nonetheless, the Jarman brothers display both a healthy cynicism and a decent enough way with an instant tune, so who knows? Perhaps these new fellas on the block deserve the benefit of the doubt for now.
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