For about six months or so when I was 15, THE BLOODHOUND GANG were my favourite band in the world ever. No exaggeration. My defining moment of love for the group came when I saw them live at Glastonbury and then afterwards I had my photo taken with the bassist and all round hunk of the band Evil Jared Hasselhoff.
I became a confirmed punk rock fan shunning all other kinds of music, talking only to my kind, until one day somebody introduced me to Belle And Sebastian and off I trotted down the long and winding indie road.
So when the chance came to see them again, I leapt high into the air and said 'heck yeah! A chance to relive my youth! Why ever not?!' I must admit I was rather excited at the thought of seeing them again, and every minute that support ELECTRIC EEL SHOCK (from Tokyo, Japan) kept playing for, was, in my mind anyway, another minute without The Gang. "Hurry up and finish!" I shouted all the way thorough their hit song 'You Bastard,' "go away now" after 'Iron Man had finished.
Luckily they listened to me and left soon after. It wasn't as though they were that good anyway. They had a naked drummer, wearing only a sock to cover his vitals. The bassist looked like a little kid, and kept pulling some of the silliest faces, and the band were leaping about like hyperactive children who've just been given sugar. The music was heavy punk rock, with no tune, just shouting but the crowd seemed to love 'em.
Finally, after much eager anticipation, The Bloodhound Gang graced the stage with their presence. These men must be nearing their mid thirties now yet still behave like 13 year old boys, laughing and joking about wee and boobies. Oh and anything at all to do with sex.
I used to listen to their albums and giggle along to the lyrics of classics such as 'Kiss Me Where It Smells Funny' and the one that everybody's heard 'The Discovery Channel'. Listening to them now, I just think they are immature and silly. Clever, yes; I never realised how many euphemisms there could be for a woman's vagina: I mean cunt, sorry crack, or possibly gash, nope slit,or did I mean fadge, minge, pussy, lady garden or (personal favourite) otters pocket or any of the other thousands of words used every second in every Bloodhound Gang song? But ground breaking,they are most defiantly not.
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The group are still silly and childish (possibly why they appeal to their demographic so well). They pay a boy 25 quid to kiss the sound-man, my secret crush on Evil Jared comes back when he takes off his top and beer bongs a whole bottle of Bombay Sapphire, but then magically disappears when he projectile vomits on lead singer Jimmy Pop.
I start gagging when the audience are asked to spit on Evil Jared, and a huge gob of phlegm lands right in the centre of his face and my night is ruined by the fat 14 year old pseudo goth screaming in my ear obliterating all the words to my once favourite tunes.
For me The Bloodhound Gang's charms have waned, leaving me disappointed and unimpressed with last nights performance. For others though I think their charms are just becoming recognised and a whole new legion of die hard fans are willing replace me. For at least six months anyway!
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