Sidestepping the fact their self-consciously 'street' name suggests that they're an Audio Bullys tribute act and turning my attention to the press bumph, The Guardian is quoted as suggesting that Beatbullyz 'could end up being the UK answer to Black Eyed Peas.' BEP's increasingly naff and lazy output tells me they need silencing, not answering, and I can only assume there weren't many other CDs on offer the day the Guardian listed Beatbullyz 'New Band of the Day.' Either that, or Paul Lester was having a bad day.
Still, with terms like 'orchestral pop,' 'hip-hop ballads' and 'poptastic' being bandied around (ok, so 'poptastic' is credited to the Daily Star, but still), I would have expected something a bit more exciting than the anemic and oh-so-nineties sounding 'Golden City' that introduces Beatbullyz's debut album. Slick whiteboy r'n'b on a budget with box-ticking rap interventions just isn't cool. It is, however, contrived.
'Bounce' is truly moronic, the endless chorus consisting of 'Bounce, c'mon!' between verses observing the crowd in a club larging it and bouncing to the DJ's choice of bangin' choonz. Chas 'n' Dave meets Lily Allen is not something you'd want to hear, but 'How the Story Goes' combines plinking piano with some cheeky cockernee semi-spoken lyrics about a day in the loife of a wheeler-dealer type. It's as awful as you'd expect. No, scratch that, it's actually worse.
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The 'anthemic' title track nabs most of its ideas for 'epicness' from Doves with some 90s dance elements thrown in for 'good' measure. Still, it's better than the track that follows immediately after, single 'Skills,' which is some kind of horrible mash-up of trance, urban, ska and flaccid funk indie. It's so bad, the first time I heard it I immediately hit 'repeat' because I couldn't believe my ears. More flimsy poppy r'n'b with lousy rapping and orchestral strikes fill the remaining gaps, with the bland dance-pop of 'Heartbeat' rounding things off. The silence that follows comes as a relief. Surely the 'kidz' aren't going to be suckered by this dross..?
http://www.myspace.com/beatbullyz
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